Archive for the ‘Improving communication’ Category
Thursday, August 12th, 2010
Here are some tips to help you:
1. Please be kind to you. Realize that the situation is challenging. Emotional reverb is expected. Your emotions, like a sad child, will have a lot to say. Honor your feelings by noticing them and breathing through them. Let yourself calm yourself with your love and breath.
2. Download the limiting belief worksheet and the belief busting sheet from the bottom right side of my homepage (www.theawarenessinitiative.com). This will help you to pinpoint the beliefs that are supporting your pain. It will also help you to support that emotional child that is hurting right now.
3. Love the child and support her, but don’t honor the thoughts that are generated. Thoughts about what happened, what you did wrong, what will happen, what someone else did wrong, whether you’ll be able to handle this, how you SHOULD be …. are very unproductive.
The only way to deal with these thoughts is to stop thinking them. Don’t follow the train of thought. You have built a neuropath in your brain that you follow and you become it. Don’t follow it. Don’t become your thought. Drop the thought completely and return to your center. If you can’t do this meditate more often so that you learn how to not get caught up in the mind.
Meanwhile, there are other tricks: Think of something more productive. Think of anything else – things that aren’t relevant to the situation. Think about things you need to do or things you enjoy. Look around you and notice trees or flowers… or a Prada handbag, if that’s your thing. Look up at the sky. Think about your garden. Like a child, distract your mind from its obsessive, painful pattern.
There is nothing to be gained by thinking about painful issues. You can’t fix your pain this way. It’s a mind myth.
Honor the tremendous opportunity to build up your mind control muscles, and return to emotional support of yourself. Love you. And know, this too shall pass and you’ll be happier and stronger than you’ve ever been.
Posted in Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Giving, Growing your business, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, intuitive counseling, transformation | No Comments »
Tuesday, April 6th, 2010
My husband and I were calling a bank officer yesterday via conference mode and got her assistant. The assistant said she’d give the message to the officer with our phone number. My husband said, “Thanks. Goodbye.” The assistant hung up. No “goodbye” or closure. Nothing. Just click.
Dave said, “That really backs me up. Why can’t people have the courtesy to say, ‘Goodbye?’” I agreed, it would be kind and respectful to say “Goodbye.” However, I pounced on the phrase, “Backed me up.” It’s so spot on. It’s exactly what happens when we get upset with people or life in general. We take issue with something and it backs us up. We get out of present time and start ranting and raving internally (or externally for those more verbal), instead of moving on with our intended life.
Why isn’t life the way we think it should be? Why don’t people act the way we think they should? Why are there so many pebbles, rocks and walls in the road? Perhaps it’s so that we learn to not get backed up by them. It’s just the way it is. We have to deal with it. Stay with what is on our plate and don’t let these obstacles back us up.
How can we avoid it? Here are some tips. First, watch it happen and you’ll know how toxic self righteousness can be. Other ways I cope:
1. Laugh at it. Make a joke.
2. Have compassion. The assistant is either having a bad day or a bad life. She’s stuck somewhere. I send love.
3. Maintain my boundaries. Say to myself, “Sorry, you’re just not worth it.” My happiness is more important than getting irritated by you.
4. Evaluate myself. Note to self, “Hmm. I hope I don’t do that. I need to be conscious of that behavior and see if I do that. It could be a sign or a lesson.”
5. Focus on the present. Say to myself, “It’s not my problem.” Is it? Can I work around this? Is this what I want to focus on now?
There are many opportunities in life to grow. An abrupt assistant gave me the opportunity to notice something in life and share it with you.
Enjoy the ride.
Posted in Coaching, Finding Joy, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, Present Time, Uncategorized, business relationships, intuitive counseling, success, transformation | No Comments »
Thursday, December 10th, 2009
This morning I awoke after a rough night of little sleep to a reply from Mary McManus (http://bit.ly/5dKE0c) to my Gratitude Challenge. What a wonderful reply it was. It inspired and grounded me in my day.
Here’s how it worked from the beginning. Mary heard me on the Darian and Darius Blogtalk radio show. Being the tremendous social networker that she is, she connected with me on Twitter and Facebook. She tweets me often, sends love and support, and I reply in kind.
The more I share my knowledge and participate in social media, the more relationships I develop with people like Mary. I’ve made friends, learned a great deal, developed business and have helped others by sending info to others about them. It just keeps growing and going. Social media done correctly is a perfect example of a win-win giving situation.
Tags: awareness, business success, Coaching, communication, Giving, intuition, intuitive coaching, intuitive insight, lessons, life lessons, relationships, self help, social media, transformation
Posted in Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Getting It Done, Giving, Growing your business, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, Power of creation, Present Time, Training, business relationships, gifts, intuitive counseling, success, transformation | 3 Comments »
Wednesday, December 9th, 2009
I had 3 hours to run several errands and I’d planned it pretty tight. Not a problem. I know the roads and I can be a master of efficiency. I refuse to rush, but I can make it all happen quickly.
2 banks, check. Fill-up with gas, check. Eat lunch, check. Home Depot for a part for our insinkerator. The salesperson lead me right to the part I was looking for … almost out of there and WHOA. The salesperson was not happy with my part solution. It was to be a replacement part for the hot water connection. The size was right, it looked right, but he wasn’t sure that it would work for hot water temperatures. He told me he was going to go online and check it out. Then he left.
He was gone a long time. I waited. A part of me wanted to get anxious because I wasn’t on schedule. In the past I may have acted anxious and stressed. Instead I meandered around looking at doors, hot water heaters, people. I found him on the phone. The information wasn’t on the internet and he called and got me specific temperature ranges for this part. Wow. What service. I now know I’ll have to watch this part because it may melt. I don’t have a choice because I can’t get another one, but geez. How great was it to find all of that out? Just by being patient.
What was the gift to him? He never knew that I held back the anxious demon within who could have been curt and maybe even rude. When I left he felt proud and appreciated. He deserved to feel that way. He did a great job. I didn’t get everything I needed to done. But, oh well… there’s always tomorrow. And today was a good day for both myself and a Home Depot salesperson.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, Coaching, counseling, Getting It Done, Giving, intuition, intuitive, intuitive coaching, intuitive insight, life lessons, moving forward, patience, relationships, self help, time management, transformation
Posted in Coaching, Creating your life, Efficiency, Getting It Done, Giving, Happiness, Improving communication, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, gifts, success, transformation | 2 Comments »
Thursday, December 3rd, 2009
I wasn’t able to get to sleep, and finally dozed off at 5 am. (a long story) My alarm was set for 8 am, as I had a meeting with an insurance agent to redo all of my policies.
The phone rang at 7:48 am! It was not a telemarketer, thankfully, as I would have been VERY rude. It was the agent calling to let me know she needed me to bring a couple things. I was not happy and she was devastated that she’d woken me up. She thought she was calling my cell and would leave a message.
I remained reasonably calm during the call, but wanted to be angry afterwards. That 12 minutes of sleep was precious to me. Why did this happen? Was the world out to get me? (said my grumpy, tired mind) No, it was an obvious opportunity.
My new agent, Janet, is very sweet. She’d worked late into the night to give me great quotes and had been delightful to work with. I knew she was very efficient and effective, and was trying her best to do a great job for me. I had to honor that. I had to let the 12 minutes go and forgive her.
I arrived at the appointment a couple minutes late and decided to be very kind and gracious to Janet. She deserved it! Our meeting went so well and we really connected. We connected so well that I’m going to speak to her group at their annual meeting. Janet is very happy and got my business. I was happier having let go of my resentment and opening to love. AND I have a new speaking engagement. This experience paid off in multiples for all.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, business success, calm mind, Coaching, communication, counseling, creative power, Getting It Done, Giving, insight, intuition, intuitive insight, lessons, life lessons, moving forward, self help, transformation
Posted in Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Giving, Growing your business, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, intuitive counseling | 1 Comment »
Monday, November 30th, 2009
Yesterday I gave by not reacting. My mom called and gave me some critical “advice” (A true oxymoron. Criticism is never appropriate advise.). I didn’t argue or complain. I lived with the understanding that she is just that way. She means well. She’ll never change.
I said, “I’ll think about that, Mom. Thanks.” She beamed because she had wanted to help and felt important and validated. Sometimes, it’s important to speak up. Sometimes, not speaking up does the most good.
What was in it for me? I feel so good about myself. I did it. I didn’t argue or complain. It’s taken me my whole life to be able to do that (way long). I’m proud of me and happy that my mom’s happy.
Please share your giving experience by clicking on the title of this blog. There will be a box at the end of the blog where you can type in a comment. I’d love to hear about your experience. Or, you can email me at debhill@theawarenessinitiative.com.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, calm mind, Coaching, counseling, getting along, Getting It Done, insight, inspiration, intuition, intuitive coaching, intuitive insight, life lessons, self help
Posted in Creating your life, Giving, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Personal growth, Power of creation, gifts, intuitive counseling, success | 2 Comments »
Tuesday, September 29th, 2009
Yesterday was Yom Kippur – a day when Jews around the world atone for their sins and seek to deeply connect with God. One of the passages in my prayer book is very meaningful to me. It speaks about the journey of life and how we move through it learning our lessons and growing. I think its wisdom is a direct hit, revealing what life is about. I’d like to share it with you:
Birth is a beginning
And death a destination.
And life is a journey:
From childhood to maturity
And youth to age;
From innocence to awareness
And ignorance to knowing;
From foolishness to discretion
And then, perhaps, to wisdom;
From weakness to strength
Or strength to weakness –
And, often, back again;
From health to sickness
And back, we pray, to health again;
From offense to forgiveness,
From loneliness to love,
From joy to gratitude,
From pain to compassion,
And grief to understanding –
From fear to faith;
From defeat to defeat to defeat –
Until, looking backward or ahead,
We see that victory lies
Not at some high place along the way,
But in having made the journey, stage by stage,
A sacred pilgrimage.
Birth is a beginning
And death a destination.
And life is a journey,
A sacred pilgrimage –
To life everlasting.
This is a time of great change on many levels. People are realizing that the old systems don’t work, and the present values are shallow. I’m coaching more and more people who are in transition, looking to find where their hearts lie and what they truly value. I feel that what we’re experiencing is a period time that potentiates a huge spiritual shift on this “sacred pilgrimage.” I’m praying for it. I’m looking for a time when people connect with their essential self and with that of others.
May journey year be joyful this year.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, business success, calm mind, change, Coaching, communication, counseling, creative power, essential self, feelings, friendship, Getting It Done, global awareness, guidance, health, insight, inspiration, intuition, intuitive, intuitive coaching, intuitive insight, lessons, life lessons, miracles, moving forward, relationships, self help, time management, transformation
Posted in Business Information, Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Growing your business, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Meditation, Personal growth, Power of creation, Prayer, Present Time, Uncategorized, business relationships, healthcare, intuitive counseling, success, transformation | No Comments »
Wednesday, September 23rd, 2009
We know that we are all different. Each one of us has habits that work for us, but not for others. In fact, our habits and behaviors may be very irritating to someone else – especially a mate or someone we work with. I’m learning that if I step back and evaluate the differences objectively I may be able to not only accept them, I can benefit from them.
For example, my husband, Dave, and I are very different in some ways. One place we differ is in how we approach a task. I like to get things done as quickly and efficiently as possible. I dive into it and focus on only the task at hand. Dave takes his time and is more relaxed about when things get done.
One day we were involved in fixing things around the house. We needed some tools to complete the task and went to Home Depot. My mind was on the task at hand, knowing that we had plans for the evening. I felt that we needed to work quickly on the repairs so that we’d be finished before dinner.
When we arrived at Home Depot I went right for the tool aisle and found an employee to help me find the correct tool. I directly asked for the tool I was looking for, and when he answered I thanked him and went to get the tool.
Dave was appalled. He felt that I’d mistreated the employee. His approach would have been to introduce himself to the person, be friendly and make some pleasant conversation before asking for information. I felt like I didn’t have time for all the conversation. I just wanted to get the job done.
It took some work, but we eventually were able to see that our different styles can actually be complementary. I keep track of time and Dave’s the PR guy. Dave gathers information and gets to know everyone while I get the tool or products we need.
We’re actually learning from each other, as well. After being around him for some time I find myself asking people’s names and taking a little more time with them – even though I’m on a “mission.” Dave, on the other hand, has become a lot more focused on doing things within a certain time period.
I’m learning that the habits in others that cause me the most angst may be the ones that complement me and teach me the most. So much to learn.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, boundaries, Coaching, communication, counseling, difficult interactions, essential self, feelings, global awareness, relationships, self help
Posted in Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Happiness, Improving communication, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Personal growth, Project Management, Uncategorized, intuitive counseling, success, transformation | No Comments »
Tuesday, September 15th, 2009
Many of us tend to view stress as emotional or mental, not realizing how much the body takes on when we go through intense periods of work, relationship issues, learning or other stressful times. We expect to be physically tired after running a marathon, but may not realize how much tension our body has absorbed after a mentally or emotionally stressful period in our lives.
We’ve been taught that when we move slowly, or are inactive we’re weak, feeble or listless. Yet, every thing and every other living being idles. My car can’t run constantly. It needs to park or to idle. My dog sleeps by my side for hours while I work. After eating a lion may rest for a week. Even hummingbirds come to an almost dead stop to rest between flights. Every other animal understands that without proper rest we wear down and don’t perform properly. Performance is balanced with refueling and rest. But, many of us humans believe in pushing. Only humans move full speed all of the time, and our performance and joy suffer the consequences.
My physical therapist said: “You don’t need to push to fatigue.” I get the concept.
I’m taking out a new lease on life. I’m adding more value into my contract by releasing the pressure valve – learning to live with ease. Ah, I feel the pressure clouds lifting already and, yes, I’m smiling.
You can read my free article to learn some tips that have helped me to relax, enjoy myself AND stay effective. Go to http://www.theawarenessinitiative.com/article.php. You can also subscribe to receive the new monthly articles.
Tags: awareness, behavior control, boundaries, business success, change, Coaching, counseling, essential self, Getting It Done, global awareness, guidance, Healing, insight, inspiration, intuition, intuitive, intuitive coaching, life lessons, performance, Relaxation, self help, Stress release
Posted in Business Information, Coaching, Creating your life, Finding Joy, Getting It Done, Growing your business, Happiness, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, Meditation, Personal growth, Power of creation, Project Management, business relationships, intuitive counseling, success, transformation | No Comments »
Friday, June 26th, 2009
I want to take a moment to let you know about a recent addition to this blog. You may have noticed a box on the left side of the page labeled “Skribit Suggestions.” Basically it is the old-fashioned idea of a suggestion box, but it has been brought up-to-date with Internet technology.
If you have an idea you’d like to discuss in this blog, or perhaps a question you’d like answered, you can submit it just by entering it through the Skribit box. You can also vote on suggestions made by others.
I began The Awareness Initiative Blog to help you to create a successful and fulfilling life. It is my hope that tools like Skribit offer new ways for you to participate in the blog; so I can better serve your needs and help more people on the road to transforming their lives.
Posted in Coaching, Improving communication, Increasing Awareness, Intuitive Insights, Life management, News of the Day, Speaking, Training, intuitive counseling, transformation | No Comments »
